The Sex Series : Spice up your sex life.

This series is just a pointer to improving your sex life by creating and rediscovering intimacy.

Note that while sex is a way to help you become closer, it cannot replace communication, so if you have issues with your partner, solve it.

Now the honeymoon period in the relationship was over like a decade ago (I’m just speaking in hyperbole) , and everything is so routine and timed, sex if ever engaged in ,is perfunctory, well guess what? you can revive your sex life with these little tips.
Or maybe its perfectly okay, but you just need more ideas to spice it up.

Let’s put back the ‘thyme n curry’ into it I’ll break this one down into smaller posts as it is lengthy.

Last Time we talked about kissing, if you missed it, click here: Kiss or Trick

The pictures you will encounter are not for the faints of heart, they are purely to illustrate my point.

1. Foreplay:  The idea behind foreplay is to prepare your partner for sex, it involves a whole lot of conventional ways we all know, but also some unconventional ways too, e.g. talking dirty (not screaming four lettered expletives, it could just be describing sensual things you enjoy), sensual massage, kissing, strip teasing. 

"foreplay is like looking through a keyhole and seeing how you'll both feel like together".

Do away with the 'Tarzan wants Jane' attitude which can be a major turn off on days when your partner seem to  have no interest in sex. Make your partner feel appreciated,needed and turned on. Caress the body like its a treasure island , and you are looking for something  precious. like you are on a tour, and also the tour guide.

Fore play leads to very good gratifying sex, because when properly done, you'll be so turned on and ready for action.,

Foreplay can restore broken connections as you do not necessarily need to have penetrative sex immediately, especially for those with troubled relationships . You'll find that foreplay will navigate you back to your focal point gradually, and it won't it be long, once you get the knack of it, you'll both be ripping each other's clothes off.

Don't just go straight to the point, take a tour.

2. Play Games: There are different games you could engage in, I’ll tell only three right now, work on your own imaginative abilities and you may yet come up with something far more interesting and a great turn on for you.

The Lottery Sex Game: Get paper, 4 small bowls or bags, and your brain. Both of you should write all the different things you would like to do(verbs i.e. action words), e.g., Kissing , sucking, grabbing, spanking, fingering, etc. put these in one bowl, and in the other bowl, place the different parts of the body named. Be specific about the parts e,g : Mouth, Ears, Clitoris, breasts, Penis.

Now make sure the tiny folded papers are properly mixed up in their separate bowls or bags.

Show time! Pick 1 paper from each bowl or bag,in front of your partner and do whatever you see, e.g Kiss and Neck, do it silently, do not tell your partner what you are about to do. Just go about it quietly.

You will be amazed at the intensity of it.

 If you want more, you'll write more in your 'goody bag' .

The Come on game:

Be flirty, if you find verbal flirtation too daunting, I suggest, sending notes, mails, or using whatever social media platform that is available to you. The trick here is not to go into lengthy descriptions about what you intend to do, or to say it frequently, that just changes it to phone sex or otherwise. 

Place a thought in your partner’s head and let it simmer , you may say something simple like "can’t wait to lick you up like ice cream", or use a memory from an exciting time you both  once had…like, "remember what happened on so and so date? I came…would like some of that soon" or something simple like "you are going to get some tonight".

It’s better to send this message as soon as your partner is away from you. You may send 1 by lunch time, and another just before the close of the day.

Date Night:

Pretend you are someone else for the night! Dress differently from your usual , act like you are on a hot date with a total stranger, arrange to meet each other in a place you don’t usually visit, giggle and don’t talk about anything important while you toe caress each other. While you may ultimately end up in a hotel room together, if you don't want to break the bank and your little ones would be around, arrange for them to spend the night in an aunt’s house.

3.Invest in good lingerie: 

If you like being conservative, you may like this

"There’s a part of every woman that wants to be some wild seductress or superhero" – Alana de la Garza

This is not an effort solely for the women folk, to buy teasing undies. Men, you can show your woman you appreciate her sexy body and clad it in seductive little pieces, surprise her today, and ask her to put it on for you, we both know where that would lead to. *winks* and it will only work if you don’t approach it with a mind of sexual gratification.

For the ladies, sexy lingerie is a definite turn on. Think I’m just being flippant, get a matching pair of red hot lacy bra n panties, put it on and stand in front of your mirror…what do you see? A vixen ready to pounce! Now wait for him in the bed, do not rise to receive him when he comes back from work, keep the lights low and leave the door to the bedroom slightly ajar with soft music playing, when he comes into the room, rise up like a vision and unleash, that’s called giving  him a pleasant surprise…adding a lil heel also intensifies the sexyiness.Oh so dramatic you say? But you want the spice back abi? So do it.

If you are really feisty and adventurous, you could include, gloves, fishnets,heels and garter belts...that's if it's something you know your man would like.

4.Strip tease:

Take your time to undress, while giving your partner different views and angles to check you out from. Undress slowly and lazily ( not too lazy, else someone may sleep off..lol).

Slow strip tease, don’t rush it, for ladies, the trick is sexy lingerie,this is a good opportunity to show case your beautiful body in your sexy lingerie.

For guys, the bulge underneath your boxers, or whatever you wear, it’s a definite turn on, and make your woman want to eat you up.

Alternatively, you could put on low sensual music and take turn undressing each other, while trailing finger tips along the body, looking into each other’s eyes while doing this silently, this is an electric trail blazer which would eventually lead to kissing  and …

well we'll continue on this next week...Ciao.

Here are some pics of lingerie types you may be comfortable with.

conservative can be sexy too...

you have no excuse being plus sized.

Daring!

vixen!

Xoxo